Home Parenting Have You Ever? THE PARENT EDITION


by Jessica Amey
have you ever

Do you remember playing the drinking game ‘Have You Ever?’*

Well this is the version for after you’ve had children. When 9pm on Friday means hitting the sack instead of hitting a nightclub.

And this version requires you to have a sip of tea over a swig of vodka 😉

So here we go…

Have you ever…

Shouted out TRACTOR / COW / BUS when you drive past one because you know your toddler loves them?

Done this even when you’re in the car on your own?

Listened to the same song on repeat more than five times at the request of your child?

Had to go and change a nappy in the middle of a meal?

Changed a nappy with your older child sat on the toilet waiting for you as they decided they needed a poo too.

Done this in the middle of a meal?!

Stopped at the side of the road so your child can go for a wee.

Pretended to be the voice of one of your child’s toys?

Sat in the car after arriving home despite needing a wee, being hungry and having no battery left on your phone because your kids were asleep and it was too peaceful to wake them.

Let your kids do something that was making your house a mess (ripping up a magazine / pulling clothing out of the drawers) because it was keeping them quiet? 

Cleaned poo out of the bath.

Spent more than ten minutes looking for a toy at bedtime because your child WILL NOT go to sleep without it?

Pretended to phone Father Christmas and tell him not to bring presents that year?
– I know this is frowned upon but it works a treat 😉 –

Read the same book more than five times in a row?

Told your kids the park wasn’t open on the day they requested to go. Ours is very rarely open 😉

Found a naked doll in a strange position?

have you ever the parent edition

Cooked a meal only for no-one to even try it?

Enjoyed sitting in a doctor’s waiting room because you got to enjoy ten minutes of peace, even if it does come at the risk of catching something from all the people coughing and breathing their germs all over you.

Bought them the thing they’ve decided they won’t leave the supermarket without because you really couldn’t face the showdown that would happen if you said no?

Wiped snot on your scarf / sleeve because you didn’t have anything else to hand?


I could keep this list up all day but I will stop there, obviously I’ve lost the game because I have done all of these things!

How did you do? How empty is your cup of tea?!

Feel free to add your own ‘have you ever’ in the comments too!

*Someone just made me aware that the game was actually called ‘I Have Never‘ – this is what having a baby does to your brain!! 😉

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